Move Over Dr. Freud, Jane Austen is Back in Town
I regret not having made Jane Austen’s acquaintance earlier in my life. Not that I hadn’t heard about her. More than I cared to, in fact. I had even seen her from a distance out and about on various campuses with mutual friends, but I had always managed to avoid a formal introduction. Eventually, however, one of our more persistent mutual friends sneaked Ms. Austen into my house, and like the wily Greeks, she did it by holding out a present. As lovely wrapping paper fell away to reveal a copy of Jane Eyre, I suppressed a sigh. Austen was bad, but Bronte was even worse. As I gazed at the book in my hand, I silently wondered how a seemingly rational modern woman could possibly be interested in the fantods of insipid lovelorn heroines and, furthermore, be so insistent about foisting them onto me.
Ms. Eyre languished in my study until a relative nosing around my shelves one afternoon suddenly exclaimed, "That's one of my favorite books!" I was almost speechless with shock as this person, who cared about weighty matters, urged me to read it. So, dear reader, I read it, and as you can no doubt guess, fell in love. Eventually, I moved on to Austen, and discovered that she blew the Brontes off of the map.
Austen's main characters are flawed people, suffering from bad parenting and surrounded by people trapped in ill-considered marriages. As their stories unfold, the heroines and heroes learn the dangers of vanity, self-delusion, impulsiveness, and excess emotionalism – the very flaws that led others to make poor marriages and become the neglectful, self-indulgent parents of the main characters. Perhaps even more important for Austen's people and her readers, most characters learn to distinguish good advice from bad. An invaluable skill, since someone is always handing out unsolicited bad advice in Jane Austen's world (and ours). Armed with self-knowledge and the confidence to rely on their own counsel, our heroines and heroes make happy marriages.
All well and good, we might say, for Austen’s time. Back then, a bad choice of a partner led to long-term misery. Bankruptcy, drunkenness, physical and mental abuse - whatever one person’s problem might be, it became the problem of everyone: children, extended families, and friends. The law offered little means of relief, while society dished out public condemnation; especially for women who spoke out against their treatment.
Despite our modern legal and social advantages, however, there is still a need for good marriage advice. After all, finding the right person is critical to the daily happiness of the partners and, maybe even more so, to any children they may have and to extended family. Although modern society may not heap scorn on people who split up, the personal, and sometimes legal, pain still hurts as much as it did in Austen’s day.
So, whenever you feel perplexed or unsure about whom to date or marry, get a nice cup of coffee or tea, settle down with any of Ms. Austen's books, and prepared to be schooled.